The Right Words to Say

Yesterday I met an amazing woman. I was playing outside with Chesley, with him wearing only a diaper. He was playing in the dirt and water puddles. We wandered over to the park. A few minutes later, two women and a little boy came over. Great, I'm thinking, my kid in only a diaper. The older women, probably mid forties, asked me if Boo was a boy or girl, then how old he is. Then she said, "my son would have been that age." Oh, no. Would have been? He died shortly after his first birthday after a surgery. He had Trisomy 21, she said. He was born without a stomach, and in surgery they tried to recreate a stomach and esophagus, but made some mistakes that cost him his life. After this, I wasn't sure what to say. I asked her his name, and her eyes lit up when she told me "Carl Joseph" and described how he looked, red curly hair. Then as we watched Chesley play, she told me a little more about Carl, and I asked a few questions about what he liked to do. She told me he was very active and had just learned to sit up by himself around his birthday. She was teary-eyed but happy to talk about her son. She showed me some pictures and was very proud. How blessed I am to have a happy (mostly) healthy child. Every day with our children is truly a gift to be savored.

No mama

These are Chesley's favorite words, as he is saying and screaming them right now and being mean. I am really trying to teach him to be nice. He just doesn't understand why he can't get his way, and he will bite and hit to get what he wants. Full temper tamtrums on the drop of a hat. Oh me! He is also talking much more than it seems like most his age are. He likes to assign possessions, like, mama's shoes, daddy's shoes, Chesley's shoes. He points to each of us, including himself and says our names. He is very particular about what he wears. Sometimes we go through the whole closet and he doesn't want to wear any of his shirts. Right now he is wearing Spider Man pajamas. His cough has been really bad still. Last night, about an hour after falling asleep, he started coughing and really could not catch a breath. He woke up and looked at me with complete panic in his eyes. Finally he got a breath and eventually could breath normally for a little while. So scary. Ok gotta go.

I'm still here

I am home this week. We both took vacation to stay home and get some things done on the house. For me, mostly just taking care of Boo and running some errands. We are getting the house painted next week, for which we are excited and nervous. It's really a necessity to get the house listed on the real estate market. We can't afford to get the siding on the house refinished, $12,000. So we are having it scraped where paint is peeling and just painted over. It's killing us to know that we aren't doing what really needs to be done. But we just don't have $12,000. We really don't even have the $5,000 we are spending, but we have to do something here. Nathan is working on replacing a back door. Then we do some landscaping. Then we can list the house. Another scary thought. We are going to try to sell it ourselves. We could pocket some money on the deal if we don't have to pay an agent $12,000-$15,000 (6% of total). Or if no one wants to buy the house for our listed price, we have more room to negotiate on price.

Now the fun part. Boo had a really rough day yesterday. There were good moments, but he was really in a bad mood. He wanted to nurse all day. He fought me to not go to sleep. He hit me, tried to bite me, screamed in my face a lot. I really have a lot of patience. I just don't know why such a hard day. Right now I am up and the boys are sleeping. I hope he has a better day today.

Family Time